May 18, 2010
In Nigeria, people often suggest that only two things are certain- this certainty is tainted with some strokes of negativity. Certainty that a drunken fellow is always playing with the switch at the generation/distribution points of PHCN, and that the Nigerian Police Force is a big source of national embarrassment. Of course, NEPA turned PHCN has a reputation that is too ugly to describe here; The NPF is a mess, to say the least.
In Nigeria, people often suggest that only two things are certain- this certainty is tainted with some strokes of negativity. Certainty that a drunken fellow is always playing with the switch at the generation/distribution points of PHCN, and that the Nigerian Police Force is a big source of national embarrassment. Of course, NEPA turned PHCN has a reputation that is too ugly to describe here; The NPF is a mess, to say the least.
Most of us “cyber-tigers” [Apologies to Fani Kayode] make it a point of duty to vent our spleen on the shoddy manner in which our dear country is being run. We also find it a little bit comforting exposing the true faces of the masked men and women that somehow, for no logical reasons find themselves in the corridors of power and have suddenly assumed the silly title of “leaders”. But today, I have chosen to pitch tent with the men and women of the Nigerian Police Force-those poor miserable folks! After much deliberations, after much obvious observations, after reflecting deeply on the real issues affecting and afflicting our police service, I have decided to make a humble attempt at projecting a true picture [as I see it] of the average Nigerian Police officer- it is an ugly picture, it is the type of picture that should shame most of the men and women that occupy space at the National Assembly in Abuja, law makers whose major pre-occupation is benefits; feathering their own nests.
Probably, about eighty percent of the Nigerian police population is made up of the “rank and file”; from the ranks of Inspectors to the newly recruited Constable. These are the majority of the police officers you encounter daily, and they represent the kwashiorkor that is the Nigerian Police Force. Their condition is so pathetic; their plight is nauseating, their misery is miserable! When we shout about mediocre policing in Nigeria, when we lament about the charlatans that represent our nation’s police force, all our verbal tirades drenching with repulsion is always directed at these poor fellows-the rank and file of the Nigerian Police force. How do you identify them? When next you are accosted by a fellow dressed in the traditional black shirt on black trousers [in that blazing heat!], a black shoe or a pair of tattered slippers, a dodgy-looking black beret, and clutching either an AK47 rifle with an extra magazine taped to it, or an antiquated Mark-IV rifle, do not flinch! That is the Nigerian police officer I am talking about; wait for a shout of “hol’ it there!”, and the picture is complete. Where is this fellow coming from? A police friend of mine argues always that every nation has the police force it pays for. I tend to agree, but to some extent.
Maybe there is an unwritten official fiat that stipulates that most of our police officers fitting the picture above must be semi-literate, or almost illiterate! [Not being funny here, but I have met many police men in the Northern part of Nigeria that revelled in shouting “Ba turenci” when approached with a query presented in English!]. A police officer that can not effectively communicate in English in a country that has that language as her lingua franca is a mobile malady. Thus, any verbal interaction between this officer and a “civilian” that is not crafted and presented in “Pidgin English” is usually met with a pregnant hesitation, and a scowl. Being an armed officer, do not make the mistake of assuming that his rage might be “impotent”-countless victims abound as a result of this unsafe assumption. Now, it is clear that a Nigerian police officer is not your friend as they want “we the people” to believe. He is an angry man venting his grumpiness at the wrong crowd rather than at the people that make his job a miserable one-the police top brass and the government that employed him [assuming he is a male officer].
The Nigerian police officer is the worst dressed police man. Whoever chose that all black uniform must have a weird sense of humour or was trying to pay the Police back for some past maltreatment! Black as a colour traps heat and the intensity of the sun in our country fears no police man, or woman! Imagine a police officer at a check point, in the middle of nowhere [or somewhere along Shagamu-Benin express way], on a normal sunny day, sweaty and drunk! [Yes, as an unwritten rule, there is always a woman selling assorted brands of local gin close to every police check-point]. Again, the colour black has a sad reputation of being lumped together with all that is perceived to be negative-this is erroneous though. Black sheep, “black devil”, black book, black man, black snake, black magic, and now, “black” policeman! Somebody started this mission to demonize the Nigerian police officer a long time ago by choosing to dress him in black, I dare say.
Now, this police officer dressed in black works at a police station that defeats all attempts at trying to depict an ugly picture. Every man to a large extent is a reflection of so many things, including his home, place of work and the car he drives. When these three are an assemblage of all that is repulsive, then the man attached to them is an embodiment of rudeness in its crass form and revulsion. It is a sad tale but true. There are thousands of police stations and posts littered across Nigeria and one thing that holds them together is their collective claim to notoriety. They are all filthy, and the working conditions of the officers and men that are unfortunate to work there remain unsavoury. Regularly, there is an irregular power supply to all the police stations [somebody at PHCN must be having a good laugh], the jails are little dungeons filled with smelly inmates, the mixture of the stench of human waste and misery fanning majestically inside the station, outside, there are numerous accident-disfigured vehicles, pepper-soup joints and local gin sellers, hung outside too on two bamboo poles-a tattered Nigerian flag and an equally tattered Nigerian Police Flag. The picture is complete. Have you ever been to a police barrack, anywhere in Nigeria? Please do. The ones I have been to are all notorious for harbouring miscreants, hooligans, and sundry fellows. The only shelter provision for our police men and women in those barracks are shanties that were built before the Biafran war, relics of the colonial era. Our police officers are sheltered like fugitives, with an average police family of four cramped together in a single room! Toilet facilities in these barracks are deplorable. All across Nigeria, all police barracks are the same, very ugly shacks! Believe me, any police officer that lives in such a mind-bending environment won’t be in a hurry to paint a picture of civility. Certainly, not a breeding ground for sane men!
Why would the average Nigerian police officer be civil? As a career choice, the police man is seen as a misfit, as a complete failure! The Nigerian Police Force is widely regarded as a dumping ground for those who are either not so keen on making an impression on academics, or those whom the promises of the class rooms failed to impress. Hence, a police officer is assumed a failure. His welfare is a fattening ground for politicians and his bosses. Was it not the ex-IG, Mr. Tafa Balogun that was hauled to jail for coveting seven billion Naira of Police funds [yes, 7 Billion!]? This was after making so much noise about improving the lot of our police officers. Our police force is so ill equipped; I weep whenever I see our “gallant” police officers at check-points armed with WW2 Mark-IV rifles! At such check-points, a rickety Peugeot 504 pick-up van or saloon is always a constant part of the picture-and sometimes scrawled on the side of the van is the cheeky slogan, “To serve and protect with integrity”! Zebrudaya must have suggested that! The officers are not always protected by bullet-proof vests, not that they would not want to but for the simple fact that they are not provided. The jalopy vans provided for patrols belch out more smoke than the legendary Lagos “Molue”. This is the police force we have protecting us in Nigeria. A police force that is angry at the society. Misguided and misdirected animosity, I must say.
Every society has the police force it pays for, not true? I certainly did not bargain for this for I am neither a PDP stalwart, a “stake holder”, or in government in Nigeria. Neither am I a police officer. The Nigerian government should be held responsible for the stinking rot that is the Nigerian Police. Systematically, our Federal government has under-funded and stultified the police force. Our police force of today is exactly what it was designed to be during the Colonial era-an instrument of coercion! The federal government has refused to equip the nations’ police and position it as a modern police force. Entrance into the officer cadre is still being based on “Federal Character” as against merit. Money voted for police officers’ welfare usually ends up in private bank accounts, pockets or ceilings, our police men are demoralized. The only time our Abuja law makers wake up to challenge police ineptitude is when a politician is assassinated, when a “prominent” party member is kidnapped, or when the police choose to withdraw their armed MOPOL guard!
Some have argued that our police officers are a representation of the larger Nigerian society, a society that is fast galloping down the slope to its destruction, a society that has thrown morals and virtues to the swine. For sure, our police men are not dedicated; amongst them are a bunch of criminals who are in uniform as the quickest means to filthy lucre. Our police men are Nigerians too, they are not foreigners. The Nigerian state does not hold any promise for her citizens; it is a replay of the Hobbesian State of Nature- all man on his own. Government at all levels in the country is an organ that caters exclusively for those that parade the corridors of power-the leeches that suck the life out of our patrimony! Believe me, I am not holding brief for the men and women of the Nigerian Police Force, I will not suggest any claims to understanding some of their very bizarre actions, but I will always stand up to argue that they are a creation of our ruling class. People are forced to seek employment in the police force with an ulterior motive because the system has allowed such rot to fester in the first place; most people in government steal so much money, enough money to run an African country! These criminals are decorated with National honours and are elevated to the silly positions of “leaders of thought”. Most police officers are barely literate and you might want to let them just be; the Nigerian state as we have it places no value on education. That is why after more than four decades as an independent nation, the passive late President Yar’dua was celebrated as the “first university graduate” to rule Nigeria! Meaning that we were content with having soldiers of fortune that had no reasonable claims to academic prowess governing us for so long! Daily, our police officers fell to the superior fire power of bandits-deaths that could have been avoided if our government have chosen to provide the necessary tools and incentives to help them function well as capable police officers; they die as unsung heroes because the Nigerian society has become such a callous one that death is no longer discussed with sadness, children even come out to dance when a corpse is being buried!
Well, the police man sees you and me as his enemies. This explains all the hostility we encounter at various check points in Nigeria. This is their way of telling you “first-hand” that the police are not your friend. When next you see a police man hurriedly shedding his uniform, hiding his rifle and running faster than you at the sound of “enemy gun shots”, do not blame him-run! The system that created the police man will not miss him if he dies, and believe me our police officers cherish life more than anything else. Next time you run into a check-point manned by angry and hungry looking police chaps, try to understand where they are coming from, think of that barracks where they are housed [those are the lucky ones o], think of their entire welfare package, remember the condition of the last police station you visited, think of the politicians in the various levels of government in Nigeria- I am sure you will shed a tear for our country, especially for the caricature police force that claims to protect us all with integrity.
[email protected]
Most of us “cyber-tigers” [Apologies to Fani Kayode] make it a point of duty to vent our spleen on the shoddy manner in which our dear country is being run. We also find it a little bit comforting exposing the true faces of the masked men and women that somehow, for no logical reasons find themselves in the corridors of power and have suddenly assumed the silly title of “leaders”. But today, I have chosen to pitch tent with the men and women of the Nigerian Police Force-those poor miserable folks! After much deliberations, after much obvious observations, after reflecting deeply on the real issues affecting and afflicting our police service, I have decided to make a humble attempt at projecting a true picture [as I see it] of the average Nigerian Police officer- it is an ugly picture, it is the type of picture that should shame most of the men and women that occupy space at the National Assembly in Abuja, law makers whose major pre-occupation is benefits; feathering their own nests.
Probably, about eighty percent of the Nigerian police population is made up of the “rank and file”; from the ranks of Inspectors to the newly recruited Constable. These are the majority of the police officers you encounter daily, and they represent the kwashiorkor that is the Nigerian Police Force. Their condition is so pathetic; their plight is nauseating, their misery is miserable! When we shout about mediocre policing in Nigeria, when we lament about the charlatans that represent our nation’s police force, all our verbal tirades drenching with repulsion is always directed at these poor fellows-the rank and file of the Nigerian Police force. How do you identify them? When next you are accosted by a fellow dressed in the traditional black shirt on black trousers [in that blazing heat!], a black shoe or a pair of tattered slippers, a dodgy-looking black beret, and clutching either an AK47 rifle with an extra magazine taped to it, or an antiquated Mark-IV rifle, do not flinch! That is the Nigerian police officer I am talking about; wait for a shout of “hol’ it there!”, and the picture is complete. Where is this fellow coming from? A police friend of mine argues always that every nation has the police force it pays for. I tend to agree, but to some extent.
Maybe there is an unwritten official fiat that stipulates that most of our police officers fitting the picture above must be semi-literate, or almost illiterate! [Not being funny here, but I have met many police men in the Northern part of Nigeria that revelled in shouting “Ba turenci” when approached with a query presented in English!]. A police officer that can not effectively communicate in English in a country that has that language as her lingua franca is a mobile malady. Thus, any verbal interaction between this officer and a “civilian” that is not crafted and presented in “Pidgin English” is usually met with a pregnant hesitation, and a scowl. Being an armed officer, do not make the mistake of assuming that his rage might be “impotent”-countless victims abound as a result of this unsafe assumption. Now, it is clear that a Nigerian police officer is not your friend as they want “we the people” to believe. He is an angry man venting his grumpiness at the wrong crowd rather than at the people that make his job a miserable one-the police top brass and the government that employed him [assuming he is a male officer].
The Nigerian police officer is the worst dressed police man. Whoever chose that all black uniform must have a weird sense of humour or was trying to pay the Police back for some past maltreatment! Black as a colour traps heat and the intensity of the sun in our country fears no police man, or woman! Imagine a police officer at a check point, in the middle of nowhere [or somewhere along Shagamu-Benin express way], on a normal sunny day, sweaty and drunk! [Yes, as an unwritten rule, there is always a woman selling assorted brands of local gin close to every police check-point]. Again, the colour black has a sad reputation of being lumped together with all that is perceived to be negative-this is erroneous though. Black sheep, “black devil”, black book, black man, black snake, black magic, and now, “black” policeman! Somebody started this mission to demonize the Nigerian police officer a long time ago by choosing to dress him in black, I dare say.
Now, this police officer dressed in black works at a police station that defeats all attempts at trying to depict an ugly picture. Every man to a large extent is a reflection of so many things, including his home, place of work and the car he drives. When these three are an assemblage of all that is repulsive, then the man attached to them is an embodiment of rudeness in its crass form and revulsion. It is a sad tale but true. There are thousands of police stations and posts littered across Nigeria and one thing that holds them together is their collective claim to notoriety. They are all filthy, and the working conditions of the officers and men that are unfortunate to work there remain unsavoury. Regularly, there is an irregular power supply to all the police stations [somebody at PHCN must be having a good laugh], the jails are little dungeons filled with smelly inmates, the mixture of the stench of human waste and misery fanning majestically inside the station, outside, there are numerous accident-disfigured vehicles, pepper-soup joints and local gin sellers, hung outside too on two bamboo poles-a tattered Nigerian flag and an equally tattered Nigerian Police Flag. The picture is complete. Have you ever been to a police barrack, anywhere in Nigeria? Please do. The ones I have been to are all notorious for harbouring miscreants, hooligans, and sundry fellows. The only shelter provision for our police men and women in those barracks are shanties that were built before the Biafran war, relics of the colonial era. Our police officers are sheltered like fugitives, with an average police family of four cramped together in a single room! Toilet facilities in these barracks are deplorable. All across Nigeria, all police barracks are the same, very ugly shacks! Believe me, any police officer that lives in such a mind-bending environment won’t be in a hurry to paint a picture of civility. Certainly, not a breeding ground for sane men!
Why would the average Nigerian police officer be civil? As a career choice, the police man is seen as a misfit, as a complete failure! The Nigerian Police Force is widely regarded as a dumping ground for those who are either not so keen on making an impression on academics, or those whom the promises of the class rooms failed to impress. Hence, a police officer is assumed a failure. His welfare is a fattening ground for politicians and his bosses. Was it not the ex-IG, Mr. Tafa Balogun that was hauled to jail for coveting seven billion Naira of Police funds [yes, 7 Billion!]? This was after making so much noise about improving the lot of our police officers. Our police force is so ill equipped; I weep whenever I see our “gallant” police officers at check-points armed with WW2 Mark-IV rifles! At such check-points, a rickety Peugeot 504 pick-up van or saloon is always a constant part of the picture-and sometimes scrawled on the side of the van is the cheeky slogan, “To serve and protect with integrity”! Zebrudaya must have suggested that! The officers are not always protected by bullet-proof vests, not that they would not want to but for the simple fact that they are not provided. The jalopy vans provided for patrols belch out more smoke than the legendary Lagos “Molue”. This is the police force we have protecting us in Nigeria. A police force that is angry at the society. Misguided and misdirected animosity, I must say.
Every society has the police force it pays for, not true? I certainly did not bargain for this for I am neither a PDP stalwart, a “stake holder”, or in government in Nigeria. Neither am I a police officer. The Nigerian government should be held responsible for the stinking rot that is the Nigerian Police. Systematically, our Federal government has under-funded and stultified the police force. Our police force of today is exactly what it was designed to be during the Colonial era-an instrument of coercion! The federal government has refused to equip the nations’ police and position it as a modern police force. Entrance into the officer cadre is still being based on “Federal Character” as against merit. Money voted for police officers’ welfare usually ends up in private bank accounts, pockets or ceilings, our police men are demoralized. The only time our Abuja law makers wake up to challenge police ineptitude is when a politician is assassinated, when a “prominent” party member is kidnapped, or when the police choose to withdraw their armed MOPOL guard!
Some have argued that our police officers are a representation of the larger Nigerian society, a society that is fast galloping down the slope to its destruction, a society that has thrown morals and virtues to the swine. For sure, our police men are not dedicated; amongst them are a bunch of criminals who are in uniform as the quickest means to filthy lucre. Our police men are Nigerians too, they are not foreigners. The Nigerian state does not hold any promise for her citizens; it is a replay of the Hobbesian State of Nature- all man on his own. Government at all levels in the country is an organ that caters exclusively for those that parade the corridors of power-the leeches that suck the life out of our patrimony! Believe me, I am not holding brief for the men and women of the Nigerian Police Force, I will not suggest any claims to understanding some of their very bizarre actions, but I will always stand up to argue that they are a creation of our ruling class. People are forced to seek employment in the police force with an ulterior motive because the system has allowed such rot to fester in the first place; most people in government steal so much money, enough money to run an African country! These criminals are decorated with National honours and are elevated to the silly positions of “leaders of thought”. Most police officers are barely literate and you might want to let them just be; the Nigerian state as we have it places no value on education. That is why after more than four decades as an independent nation, the passive late President Yar’dua was celebrated as the “first university graduate” to rule Nigeria! Meaning that we were content with having soldiers of fortune that had no reasonable claims to academic prowess governing us for so long! Daily, our police officers fell to the superior fire power of bandits-deaths that could have been avoided if our government have chosen to provide the necessary tools and incentives to help them function well as capable police officers; they die as unsung heroes because the Nigerian society has become such a callous one that death is no longer discussed with sadness, children even come out to dance when a corpse is being buried!
Well, the police man sees you and me as his enemies. This explains all the hostility we encounter at various check points in Nigeria. This is their way of telling you “first-hand” that the police are not your friend. When next you see a police man hurriedly shedding his uniform, hiding his rifle and running faster than you at the sound of “enemy gun shots”, do not blame him-run! The system that created the police man will not miss him if he dies, and believe me our police officers cherish life more than anything else. Next time you run into a check-point manned by angry and hungry looking police chaps, try to understand where they are coming from, think of that barracks where they are housed [those are the lucky ones o], think of their entire welfare package, remember the condition of the last police station you visited, think of the politicians in the various levels of government in Nigeria- I am sure you will shed a tear for our country, especially for the caricature police force that claims to protect us all with integrity.
[email protected]
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