Thursday, 17 May 2012
The Devil And Our Rulers By Sonala Olumhense
Columnist:
Sonala Olumhense For a long time, I was of the view that Nigerians, especially their rulers, were responsible for Nigeria’s woes. Last Sunday, Mr. Goodluck Jonathan identified for us the idiot who has held us down for over 50 years: The devil.
The President of Nigeria was speaking at the First Batptist Church in Garki, Abuja, to mark the New Year. “When you compare Nigeria to other nations,” he said, “Nigeria is not moving fast enough…We have our challenges and that is where the devil comes in and puts road blocks.”
It was a brilliant peace of investigation by Mr. Jonathan. The devil has always been a wily one. Think about it: the Garden was the most peaceful place, defined by abundance. Abundance of love and harmony and beauty and promise: God had ensured nothing was in short supply.
Well, one thing had been lacking: Adam was lonely, but the Lord had immediately rectified that, in the shape of Eve, one so exemplary and beautiful Adam privately called it the Garden of Eve.
That was until the snake slithered in. He was nothing like Adam: he knew where to shop for the prettiest clothes and finest perfumes, and where to buy the latest executive jets without waiting in line. He knew all the great restaurants, clubs and wines.
But then, that afternoon, Adam returned from his labours. One glance at the glint in the eyes of the First Lady, and he knew. Adam, with menace in his heart, snatched a cudgel. The devil vanished into the shrubs and has been on the run since then.
I did not realize he had arrived in the most powerful address in Abuja. But Mr. Jonathan’s diagnosis is absolutely correct: the devil has to be the one responsible for the mess in our country. Each time a powerful ruler or his wife announces a programme or policy thrust, the devil arrives and takes them to a fancy restaurant.
“Not a very good idea,” he says, “not good at all.”
That was how he stopped Olusegun Obasanjo, for instance, from the electricity file. “You want all Nigerians to have electricity?” the devil thundered. “Has it occurred to you how happy that will make the entire population? And how much money you will deny The Party?”
“B…But I wanted…”
“But me nothing!” the devil said. “Billions of dollars, and you want to throw it all away. Do you know that with that kind of money you will live forever? You keep making these decisions. You can budget for roads, but do you really have to make sure they are built?”
Obasanjo smiled, feeling immense wisdom within his agbada.
And the devil was not far away when Umaru Yar’Adua assumed office. “You don’t have to declare that emergency in the power sector,” he told him, “or worry about the rule of law. Nobody will remember. And you must never let Goodluck Jonathan serve as leader even if you are dying.”
Yar’Adua, sadly, did die. And Jonathan, celebrating his luck, became Acting President, and then President.
At which point the devil again emerged from his penthouse suite in Aso Rock. “This is your time,” he assured Jonathan.
Mr. Jonathan has already declared how good a listener he is. And the devil is an eloquent speaker. Perhaps it is no coincidence that from Bayelsa State to the presidential bedroom, Mr. Jonathan has yet to be accused of any originality, such as fulfillment of any promises or completion of assignments, beyond reading a speech. It is the devil’s roadblock.
The devil is responsible for Jonathan’s failure to implement a boatload of reports, from Halliburton to Justice Uwais, which could have improved many things.
He advised Mr. Jonathan never to lead by example. Mr. Jonathan’s electoral promises, for instance, have been exhaustively documented in this column. But then the devil told him to ignore them. And although people were blaming Mr. Jonathan about two months ago, it was actually the devil who compiled that infernal list of 2011 National Honorees.
In addition to strategy, the devil is also a brilliant economist. He advised Mr. Jonathan not only to double or triple the price of petrol, but to spring it as a New Year Day surprise on everyone, including the people with whom he was negotiating on the subject.
After those exertions, the devil retired to his study to resume his research, leaving Mr. Jonathan to face the first nationwide street opposition to a national ruler in 98 years.
For seven months, Mr. Jonathan flew the executive jets of power with a bulbous smile on his face. Tomorrow morning, as the nationwide strikes begin and he is confronted by the electorate into whose back the devil dug his pickaxe on January 1, he will not be smiling very much.
Let us be clear: the unprecedented opposition to Mr. Jonathan and his insensitive blunder is not—repeat, NOT—about fuel subsidies. It is about government as farce; about the corruption and collusion of those who run Nigeria. It is about the greed which bleeds. The fuel subsidy gaffe simply provides the binoculars for the people to see clearly, and the courage to fear no longer. We are grateful to Mr. Jonathan for this singular accomplishment.
Twice in this column, on October 25, 2009 and January 31, 2010, I called for ‘A Scream In The Streets;’ a people’s walk to paralyze in order to energize. I am grateful to Mr. Jonathan for making it possible.
When Mr. Jonathan says Nigeria is not moving fast enough, he means that she is backward. But in the devil he hangs the wrong criminal. Nigeria’s road blocks have principally been her corrupt, conniving rulers who do not know what leadership means.
For half a century, these irresponsible rulers have budgeted our commonwealth into their own pockets and those of their wives, concubines and co-travelers.
This week’s rallies may be one small step for each participant, to paraphrase Neil Armstrong, but they will be one giant leap for Nigeria. This week’s scream may be one little falsetto for each participant, but it will be a roof-fracturing story-changer for Nigeria. After this, those who submit themselves for leadership must lead without the forked tongue and false advocacy of the devil.
There is something Mr. Jonathan can still do today. As I have said, this road intersection is about the farce of governance, which he can attempt to remodel. He can start by restore the fuel subsidy right away, and set a short time-frame during which work must begin on refineries, old and new, and then resume his negotiations with Nigerian groups. To show good faith, he and his wife must declare their assets within 48 hours, and agree with stakeholders about a new shape for the anti-corruption war.
Still I do not think anything will stop the lessons the people of Nigeria will teach this week about who really owns the land.
I may not sleep a wink tonight. And I don’t care.
• sonala.olumhense@gmail.com
Comments
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GEJ is d devil
Submitted by Akinsola Iyiola (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 17:53.
The devil destroying Nigeria is GEJ. This is a land of unfulfilled promises. Yar'adua(& Jonathan) promised a state of emergency on power within 100 days. No emergency was declared till Yar'adua died. Jonathan gave a one thousand and one promises. Till date he hasnt fulfil a single one. When he needed more money for him and his illiterate wife to steal, they must now remove fuel subsidy. He is correct on d devil, but d devil's name is Badluck Ebele Jonathan.
where is the manna
Submitted by Abdul (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 15:32.
Where is the manna? is it in the death traps called road or the thousands of naira Nigerians pay NEPA without enjoying electricity? is the manna in the bore hole we had to dig for ourselves so we could enjoy a partially clean water or in the skyrocked school school fee that does not give value for money.
I am sure you do not really understand the issues at stake. again i ask you which manna are you talking about? if you call the N65 we were paying for petrol manna then you are terribly disinformed.
Fake NDDC, NLC Niger Deltans are with you
Submitted by Warri Numba One (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 15:10.
Please fellow Niger Deltans you should ignore calls by the fake group NDDC, we are part of the NLC struggle, we will protest with you.
Where was NDDC when GEJ and co were budgeting N1 billion for feeding only,
Where was NDDC when GEJ has been , and still junketing around the world with "recode" entourage.
The NDDC does not represent the wishes and aspiration of the people of Niger delta and thus cannot speak for us..
let them come with their paid anti-protesters, we will crush them.
REMOVAL OF SUBSIDY IS EVIL, SUBSIDY REMOVAL IS BAD, IT IS ILL-TIMED AND ITS LACED WITH CORRUPTION.
SOLIDARITY FOREVER......
the devil and nbigerian leaders
Submitted by OBADON (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 13:15.
O blessed eve of our march against the looters! O blessed threshold of our liberation from the stranglehold of theimperialist agents! God bless Nigerians with the courage to CHANGE the landscape of our country - politically, ecomonically, ideologically, spiritually. Bless us with the verve and pluck, the fearlessness with which we must uproot the DEVILS we know! Amen.
Deri is not clever, i wonder why anyone would pay him to blogg
Submitted by Yom Yom on January 8, 2012 - 12:52.
You are not even that clever to woo people for your paymaster, everytime you write, people knows you've been paid and it makes me wonder why anyone would even pay you to blogg for them unless someone like gej who is as dull as yourself, everytime you write you chat shit.
Silence!!!
Submitted by Speaker001 (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 12:31.
Silence and patience are all we need right now. We cast our trusts on the shoulders of this Ijaw leader when we pushed him to power with our votes...now again time, season, and tendencies require us to do same. Just for a moment let's keep calm, let's trust this man and see where he's leadin our nation to. Period!
Dont lose your sense
Submitted by Adeoye (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 12:03.
I can now see the link between the two - poverty and religion. The irony is that, pastors are getting richer as more people troop to churches for spiritual help. So, for pastors, things have never been so good. Hence, dont expect any pastor to join protests that will librate their followers and make them require less of pastors prayers. It will mean reduced number of people in churches and directly result in reduced tith. In other words, their business will suffer if the economy takes shape. They love it like this, afterall, they are getting richer and buying private jets in the midst of poverty ridden followers. God is watching and will strike those people like thunder when HE has their time.
For the followers, go out on Monday to demand better life for yourself and your family. Otherwise, the generation yet unborn will curse you in your grave.
Must we continue to enjoy mana from heaven
Submitted by Analyst (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 11:42.
Subsidy must go...there can never be a better time, it certainly must go...even God stopped mana to the people of israel talkless of man.
This very witch between our legs
Submitted by emeka k duru (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 10:31.
I thought about this Devil yesterday and thought of it to be very foxy with a mini-cab driver's sense of economics arriving at Aso Rock with a calculator: Sir look at it this way Nigeria makes X billion amount of dollars I mean dollars everyday. Multiply this by 155 and you have trillions of Naira every day,why do you bother going after people,your friends who have cornered just a few billion in a year. a drop in the Ocean. You can take a billion for yourself without anybody noticing. I am talking trillions of Naira daily.And you have less than 5,000 friends ,your backers,don't offend them.They are your bedrock.The people who hold the ladder,at worst you can make more money by just increasing the pump price of fuel and even exchanging the Naira at 158 will compensate for any you know.Ha! ha!! ha!!!
"Cheers! You are a god-send! !
MuMu President
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 09:36.
How can this President be so stupid as to lay the blames of our underdevelopment on the doorsteps of the devil? So what does he do now against the devil? bansh it as God did in the Garden of Eden? Oh God, why do we deserve this?
One last thing I know the President won't do is to declare his assets!!! He's not honest enough!!!
Jonathan Beware Of The Ides Of January
Submitted by Igbiki (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 09:22.
This was how it started in 1966. Unmitigated corruption and a massively rigged federal elction. If Jonathan hadnt rigged he would still have won but with a slimmer margin but he wasnt taking any chances. Thats how a never before seen scale of rigging was unleashed both in its sophiscation and its reach.
And like Operation Wetie, the subsidy removal has energized the masses and this time not only in the western region but all over the country.
Nigeria has never recovered from 1966 and after 2012 Nigeria will never be the same again.
I may not sleep a wink this week. But I don’t care.
Decisive actions
Submitted by Sk (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 09:15.
Nigerian Government make up policies to suite the few rich men they favour... Fuel subsidy removal is just another way of enriching another groups of few rich men after satisfying the earlier group. Fuel subsidy removal is Government's way of creating another medium for corruption. The government is promising a better economy. But at what cost? The timingis very poor when corruption stinks in the air... Most ravaging is the political instability tearing the country apart. Anywhere u look, there is chaos...
Decisive actions
Submitted by Sk (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 09:12.
Nigerian Government make up policies to suite the few rich men they favour... Fuel subsidy removal is just another way of enriching another groups of few rich men after satisfying the earlier group. Fuel subsidy removal is Government's way of creating another medium for corruption. The government is promising a better economy. But at what cost? The timingis very poor when corruption stinks in the air... Most ravaging is the political instability tearing the country apart. Anywhere u look, there is chaos...
agents of Johathan, how much
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 08:46.
agents of Johathan, how much ave u been paid. God will judge you and cohorts
Fee Speech or free speech ?
Submitted by AdeO (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 08:46.
That's what I like about free speech some people think it means speak freely without thinking please please read Deri's comets if you feel like laughing at his/her stupidity. If not give it a pass don't waste your time. If you have heard enough of this confused individual please ignore him trust me he/she would go away enough said.
Jonathan's Gamble!
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 08:39.
These are very interesting times. History is full of the wreckage of leaders who overplayed the goodwill of their people. Before Dr Okonjo-Iweala and Dr Aganga, a president budgeted 1 billion naira for feeding the presidential family! As the inferno rages the families of these two ministers and others live abroad. Jonathan is a fox of a personality: He pretended not to be interested in power during the Alamasiegha saga, he did it again during the Yar'Adua situation. He has become Nigeria's no 1 professional opportunist and ethnic 'chess master' and God is set to disgrace him.
I want some of Deri's Ogogoro
Submitted by Damocles (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 08:17.
That "Sapele Water" that Deri is constantly quenching his thirst with must be pretty strong if he thinks that the oil in southern creeks of NIGERIA belongs to his tribe/section. I think it is because of people like Deri that why the Looter OBJ is always exclaiming: "i dey laff O". My friend, do not wish Purgatory upon your people(since u luv 'em so much) with your eyes wide open. The fish belongs to Niger Delta people, not the "oyeil". A word is enough for even inebriated retards!Render unto 1Nigeria what is 1Nigeria's.
WE DONT NEED THE EXECUTIVES
Submitted by MUSA (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 07:39.
WE DONT NEED THE EXECUTIVES TO SLASH THEIR SALARIES BY 25 PERCENT BUT INSTEAD GOVERNMENT MONEY SHOULD NOT BE USED TO BUY ANY CONSUMABLES FOR THE EXECUTIVES AND THEIR TRANSPORTATION SHOULD BE PAID BY GOVERNMENT ONLY IF THEY ARE ON OFFICIAL DUTY AND HOUSE RENTS SHOULD BE DEDUCTED FROM THEIR SALARIES AS THEY ARE FULLY MONITIESED.
DAVID WEST SERVED BUHARI-but the devil sent him to jial
Submitted by deri (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 07:09.
Happily the men leading the fight against fuel subsidy ARE ijaws also --OWEI LAKEMFA and David WEST-where are the ijaws in the fuel marketing club name--them--you see none--yet the oil that feeds the nation comes from their back yard--not katsina state where buhari hails from----hatred against the ijaw in aso rock started long before the death of yaradua and has not stopped since-are you not ashamed-that 51 yrs after the brits left we still dont have an ijaw man like tinubu importing fuel for us-want libya style treatment for GEJ--try it on him if you are really born of a woman--and see we are waiting and wait we will for the murder of GEJ by the tripod-that was how u deceived us into ditching Gani-only for you to use his wife and son to float yr evil ideas against GEJ. Why did u not vote for late Gani? Because Ciroma told you not to-move beyond my wife is ibo- i am yoruba--so igbos must vote for buhari boko haram and tambuwal
buhari who jailed tai solarin and ajasin for presido
Submitted by deri (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:57.
Will NLC obey the court orders or not? If NO! then falana should be seen as a political thug-NLC wants to fight for kwara state but not for the over 70 Ibos slaughtered recently by boko haram.
That is the niger delta for you-they are called ogogoro drinkers with no brains daily-look at those leading the fight against fuel subsidy. Are they not ijaws? From--david west--Owei lakemfa-sagay Itsekiri--keyamo delta--urhobo via ogun state--how many fulanis did we see openly disagree with boko haram-even the crisis in Jos, Mandalla, and Adamawa? But the third class fiddles in 9ja, known as the ijaws will always serve their masters in the tripod--and find reason for it! Only for the noose to be dropped around them neck after use! like Gowon did to them! Abacha hanged ken the only civil rights activist to be killed in Nigeria-now this! Ogonis were used to fight ken-now ijaws are being used to fight GEJ--the war is about the control of crude oil in the ND-period-animals
reply
@tundemash
Submitted by deri (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:49.
Was it not this same Tunde Bakare, who conducted surveys with his church members against GEJ? Which indicated that Buhari was leading Jonathan in his home made polls? Tunde Bakare did say Yara Adua should quit. But NEVER asked that Jonathan be allowed to take over. Again why did Yaradua refuse to hand over to GEJ? We now know Bakare was only playing politics or attempting to pave the way for himself and Buhari to stand for election. Go and read your papers very well and see the threats issued by militants. Again why should 9JAS urge Turai to quit when GEJ was constitutionally empowered to assume the mantle of leadership from Yaradua? Is it not the same abrakadabra that the likes of Tunde bakare and buhari are playing with GEJ? Concerning the fuel subsidy rubbish. What is the difference between when Turai was in Aso Rock and now that she is gone? The militants should wake up from their slumber and have us go our separate ways. Instead us using our resources to feed ungrateful gluttons
Jonathan's 2012 budget funded thru oil subdiy removal (3)
Submitted by tundemash (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:20.
-N52.87 million to rehabilitate 10 presidential houses on Ibrahim Taiwo Street, Abuja, despite allocating/spending N101 million
-N530.57 million to rehabilitate the State House and Dodan Barracks, despite spending/allocating N628.64 million this year on the two properties
-N357.731 million for repairs and renovation of the administrative building at the Villa, despite allocating/spending N302.29 million on this last year
-N62.23 million for the rehabilitation of the banquet hall dome roof, despite allocating/spending N81 million on the roof last year.
-N992.57 million for feeding the president and the vice president
Jonathan's 2012 budget funded thru oil subsidy removal (2)
Submitted by tundemash (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:19.
- N385.35 million for land reclamation at the State House Medical Centre
- N101.67 million for the rehabilitation of transformer substation in the villa
- N97.95 million for extension/expansion of State House car parks (The more SUVs and cars you accumulate the more ground you need to park them in!)
- N108 million for communication equipment at the Villa, Dodan Barracks and vice president’s guesthouse
- N36.88 million to rehabilitate presidential/ministerial chalet at the Nnamdi Azikiwe Airport, despite spending/budgeting N48 million for this last year
Jonathan's 2012 budget funded thru oil subdiy removal (1)
Submitted by tundemash (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:17.
- N280 million for two bulletproof Mercedes Benz saloon 600 E Guard at N140 million each
- N356.72 million for new vehicles in the presidential fleet
- 5 Mercedes Benz 350 (semi plain/partial bullet proof) at N25 million each, 10 jeeps (assorted – Range Rover, Prado and Land Cruiser) at N10 million each, and accessories for these vehicles will cost N25 million
- N57.43 million to upgrade facilities at the Presidential Villa
- N127.50 million to overhaul power generating sets
- N512.385 million to refurbish the family wing of the main residence
@Deri: Re: u are already dancing as if you have won the battle
Submitted by tundemash (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:13.
@Deri
If the battle was won 2 yrs ago when Turai was bullying your hero and on this same SR, we protested, in Lagos people protested and Tunde Bakare lead his group to Abuja to protest; it will also be won this year. In the history of mankind, no tyrant (animal) outlasts the people. With that historical precedence, I am hopeful, the animal would be returned to the zoo; if you like make him a king.
Two years ago, while Jonathan was being bullied by Turai Yaradua, then Deri was busy licking the ass of the Yaradua's aides.
David West and Owie Lakemfa have identified with the people way back, it is only animals like Deri, Stanley Igwe, kulkat that thinks oil price increase would not affect the fisherman at Otuoke while they eat the crumbs from Jonathan's table in Abuja. Madam Umblella already naively claim she was a widow .... did she not ? Her "fellow widows" !!! I dey laugh O !!!
@Deri a.k.a Anonymous Re: our goliathas are back with d remains
Submitted by tundemash (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 06:04.
U claim "The Niger Delta Democratic Coalition (NDDC) on Saturday warned the leadership of the NL), to stay away from the Niger Delta in its planned strike scheduled to hold tomorrow, saying that the group would mobilise over one million youths to resist any attempt to enforce the proposed strike action in the region."
Where was NDDC 2yrs ago when Turai Yaradua was bullying coward GEJ ? How come you trusted yorubas who protested in Lagos when the Yaradua group didn't want GEJ to be acting President? How come you trusted Tunde Bakare, a yoruba man, who risked everything to lead his group to Abuja to protest?
Foolish Mr. Anonymous, it is too late in the day, people are wiser now and have seen through the divisive lies of govt and its agents. If "Enough is Enough" group succeeded 2 yrs ago without the fake NDDC, we will succeed this year without them. Let them be patient, we will soon send the animal back to them, let them make him a king in the animal kingdom !!!
@tundemash-u are already dancing as if you have won the battle
Submitted by deri (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 05:32.
may be the animals in David west and Owei lakemfa will also be returned to the zoos where they were taken from to fight GEJ. Are they not ijaws like GEJ -subsidies are gone let us see the animal who will give GEJ the Gaddafi treatment in Nigeria--try it-then shall we know if you are really an agent of the CIA or not-out in the cold planting ideas on how to overthrow democratically elected governments in africa--are the americans in OWS asking the army to stage a coup in america--african mentality--u are not different from the cows who jubilate on the streets on africa dancing and waving green leafs any time a coup is announced in the dark continent--go and chase gej out of aso rock for buhari--animal
Good Call
Submitted by Spirit (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 05:17.
You are so on point sir. Which American President said "The buck stops here"? Our leaders grew from this same environment, so, we cannot expect anything else from them. The populace have been awaken and woe to that leader on whom our anger is directed. It would have been better if he had not filled the form to contest his first election. #OccupyNigeria all the way!
Sonala is a die hard supporter of buhari
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 05:06.
Sonala is a die hard suporter of buhari-if not the devil who killed over 20 igbos, in adamawa, 45 in mandalla and 11 again in Yola on friday-6 in kaduna--307 in iraq within one week- 34 in syria 67 in afghanistan and 107 in russia theatre bombing--yes it was the devil--aljani--yr aljani
A WONDERFUL DEVIL OPPORTUNITY
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on January 8, 2012 - 05:05.
May the same devil terrorising the nation also lure the masses to come out en masse to for the first time dare the guns and tanks and remain courageous to pull the bull by the horn.
It has gone beyond F-Subsidy removal but time to question the consistency of merging an unmanageable people into one entity where lives are destroyed without emotion or sentiment.
Let monday come.
If within this week nothing happens, Nigeria is virtually doomed for life.
Another January 15 is coming this week.
Shall it be a repeat of 1966 ???
