Thursday, 17 May 2012
Greed, As A Christmas Gift By Sonala Olumhense
Columnist:
Sonala Olumhense Hunger.
It is the first definition of our humanity. We all must eat to live.
Hunger kills. Sparks riots. Starts wars. You have to eat and to have the ability to continue to do so. It is only when our stomachs enjoy the comfort of food that we can focus on life.
The question of what man eats is a fascinating field. Some of the things other people eat would repulse us; some of the things we enjoy as legitimate food have other people gasping for air.
It is not always hunger that makes us eat; sometimes, habit accomplishes that. The human brain, working on a clock we cannot control, informs us we need to eat. Experienced cooks use certain spices and flavours and aromas to entice us towards food.
As we also know, some people eat more than others. In general, people with larger frames eat more than others, but this is not always the case. And food may make a mountain of a once skinny person, although that is not always the case.
An ability to shake our head in the presence of food, especially well-cooked delicacies, says a lot about whom we are. Few people are capable of it; they cannot be corrupted with food.
Still, we all must eat. How much we consume depends on something we call an appetite, which is something from a need for food, to a craving. Some people have small appetites; others have something of a volcano.
Last week, just before Christmas, Nigerians had a chance to assess the appetites of the two most powerful men in their country.
It turns out that both of them, Goodluck Jonathan and Namadi Sambo, actually have the voracious kind. In 2012, they are asking the Nigerian people for a feeding allowance of N3million.
That is per day.
That figure works out at nearly N1billion for the year, according to the 2012 Appropriation Bill which Mr. Jonathan’s presented to the National Assembly on December 16.
Nigerians are outraged, but in order to understand the psychological underpinnings of these numbers, Nigerians ought to step back into their history.
Once upon a time, there was a boy whose parents were not rich. He was so poor that he did not even have shoes on his feet, despite his having to walk miles and miles to school every day.
He was a tough lad. He walked. On and on he walked, until he reached Abuja. And he said to himself, “Just look at me, a common village boy, here in this glittering city. Who would ever have imagined I would make it to Abuja on bare feet?”
And he kept walking. He walked until he reached Aso Rock, the seat of presidential power. He sat down on the big chair, smiling broadly to himself in the big chair.
“Just look at me,” he thought to himself, “a common village boy now here in Aso Rock. I know what I am going to do: I am going to buy myself shoes at last.”
Just then, a thought occurred to him. “Why am I thinking about shoes? I am bigger than shoes!”
Right there and then, he ordered a new jet plane. And another. And another. Three new planes to add to the palace’s huge fleet.
“Yes sir!” they told him as they ran out to go and get him his jets.
And he laughed and laughed until tears ran down his cheeks. “I know what we are going to do,” he told his friend in the next chair.
“What are we going to do?” his friend asked.
“We are hungry,” he said. “We are going to eat like nobody has ever eaten before. We are going to eat things that people have never eaten before. We are going to eat things people have never been able to buy before!”
And so, starting next week, a new day will dawn in Aso Rock. I presume breakfast will be four and five-course Australian and French meals—including exotic crocodile eggs, balls of lions and biceps of tigers—flown in daily in glittering new jets from Melbourne and Paris, complete with kitchen, service, and security staff. Money is no object.
Lunch will be Oriental cuisine only by Japanese cooks in Japanese kitchens flown daily to Abuja, with different courses served by delicate Japanese waitresses singing Madonna’s “Celebrate.” And no kitchen staff, aircraft, pilot or waitresses must be permitted to make more than two trips throughout the year. Money is no object.
Dinner will be exclusively Nigerian cuisine, but it will be cooked daily in temperate climes and flown in and served under specially-built umbrellas. Each of the several courses will be accompanied by different musicians and dancers flown in from different countries. Money is no object.
This is important in order to underline the significance of the transformation agenda. It will also make clear why N1billion Naira for the feeding of two very important men and their households is nothing. New estimates may need to be sent to the National Assembly, especially when you consider the cost of foodstuff these days, or a virement made from the education budget.
And critics would do well to remember that the President eats not only in his official residence, but in the office as well, and maybe the Vice-President likes to eat in his office and at home. And both need a different category known as refreshments because, well, they do need to be refreshed regularly.
Have we considered that when the president eats, he likes to take a drink? Or that the kind of drink he enjoys, which cannot be made public because it is a security issue, is very expensive. Maybe that presidential drink is what makes his transformation agenda so successful.
Looked at closely, the truth is that the budgetary allocation for feeding Nigeria’s is not a budgetary allocation at all. It looks like a harvest for the “winners.” It is the most insensitive, pompous and presumptuous provision I have ever heard of, especially when considered against similar provisions in it. It is the most eloquent statement about the nature of the Jonathan mission.
For anyone in office, these numbers would be bad enough, but for officials who claim they want to transform the society, this question is inevitable: “transform to what?”
Because these numbers clearly show an effort to transform government funds into private hands.
Only two things could have made this situation worse. The first is that Mr. Jonathan and Mr. Sambo are farming these funds over to themselves at a time that Mr. Jonathan is saying, in connection with his plot to foist higher oil prices on Nigerians: “There is nobody who will want to deliberately inflict suffering on his people. Goodluck Jonathan can never be one.”
And he has also said, “Yes, I am here in the State House and being fed by government but that does not keep me so far from the people.”
The second thing that could have made the situation worse is that there are senior preachers of the administration, such as the Finance Minister, Mrs. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, who ought to have a problem with this kind of governance, but who curiously do not.
Yes, Mr. Jonathan is being fed by the government, but he is obviously much hungrier than even his supporters had feared. And if he is going to eat the baby’s lunch in full view of its parents, will he not eat the baby when its parents are away?
Merry Christmas, Nigeria.
• sonala.olumhense@gmail.com
Comments
18 comment(s)
Post a comment
Deri pls stop exposing your foolishness
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on December 27, 2011 - 13:36.
Who is Boko Haram? These are transformation of pdp thugs or Deri you seems so foolish and blind by the blood pay you receive to know this. Their former spokesperson arrested and brought to court said all and you heard it. Who is Ndume? A pdp stalwart sponsoring terrorism, arrested but he is now free again via gej pressurized bail from court. You were once here calling buhari the sponsor but since the revelation you have kept mute. With the way gej laugh with his cos, it is clear they all know about the killing.
do they care even if boko haram kills 50m 9jas-mabinu
Submitted by deri (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 22:31.
Was Jona President when these riots took place in the North? Over 35 Nigerians just got blown into oblivion on exmas day. Yet all the goliaths can think of is a budget which will benefit their elders in the old regions of Nigeria and not my niger delta from where the resources 4 the budget had hailed from since 1957- 1980 May. Religious violence in Zaria. Much property is destroyed. 1980 December 18-20 Riots in Kano. The Maitatsine sect, 4, 177 are killed. *1982 September 29 ? October 3. Disturbances in Kaduna, Kaduna State. 53 killed and many churches are burned. *1982 October 29-30 . Further trouble in Maiduguri, Borno State, Maitatsine sects. 118 die. *1984 February 27 - March 5. Disturbance in Yola, Gongola State. Maitatsine sect, 568 die. 1985 April 26-28 Riot in Gombe, Bauchi State. Maitatsine sect. 105 die. Dont you care-when your brothers and sisters get blown away just like that on exams day-dont you care!?
sonala, u laugh while children are dying in d hands of BH
Submitted by DERI (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 22:29.
Was Jona President when these riots took place in the North? Over 35 Nigerians just got blown into oblivion on exmas day. Yet all the goliaths can think of is a budget which will benefit their elders in the old regions of Nigeria and not my niger delta from where the resources 4 the budget had hailed from since 1957- 1980 May. Religious violence in Zaria. Much property is destroyed. 1980 December 18-20 Riots in Kano. The Maitatsine sect, 4, 177 are killed. *1982 September 29 ? October 3. Disturbances in Kaduna, Kaduna State. 53 killed and many churches are burned. *1982 October 29-30 . Further trouble in Maiduguri, Borno State, Maitatsine sects. 118 die. *1984 February 27 - March 5. Disturbance in Yola, Gongola State. Maitatsine sect, 568 die. 1985 April 26-28 Riot in Gombe, Bauchi State. Maitatsine sect. 105 die. Dont you care-when your brothers and sisters get blown away just like that on exams day-dont you care!?
ATBU
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 22:28.
i dont understand when people say we only criticise and dont proffer solutions?Are we paid to offer solutions?who told you the people in government need our solutions?,do you think they dont know the problems and the solutions to those problems?ATBU,i have to thank you for your very insightful contribution to solving the food crisis in aso villa,im sure goodluck and namadi would be very grateful to you for helping them solve the problem of selecting who goes hungry and who gets fed at the villa.
Sonala spare a thought for those boko haram killed
Submitted by Deri (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 22:28.
Was Jona President when these riots took place in the North? Over 35 Nigerians just got blown into oblivion on exmas day. Yet all the goliaths can think of is a budget which will benefit their elders in the old regions of Nigeria and not my niger delta from where the resources 4 the budget had hailed from since 1957- 1980 May. Religious violence in Zaria. Much property is destroyed. 1980 December 18-20 Riots in Kano. The Maitatsine sect, 4, 177 are killed. *1982 September 29 ? October 3. Disturbances in Kaduna, Kaduna State. 53 killed and many churches are burned. *1982 October 29-30 . Further trouble in Maiduguri, Borno State, Maitatsine sects. 118 die. *1984 February 27 - March 5. Disturbance in Yola, Gongola State. Maitatsine sect, 568 die. 1985 April 26-28 Riot in Gombe, Bauchi State. Maitatsine sect. 105 die. Dont you care-when your brothers and sisters get blown away just like that on exams day-dont you care!?
Not Only For Food
Submitted by Igbiki (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 14:03.
I think there is an issue here and that in the coming days Reuben Abati will come out with some clarifications.
"The said money is not only for food but for building a new kitchen, buying kitchen equipments and a new house for the kitchen DPO and his wife bla bla bla."
I think its about time we eat all this Vultures masqurading as our Leaders because they have eaten us enough.
ALL THIS...
Submitted by Koboko-Dem! (not verified) on December 26, 2011 - 13:53.
All on borrowed money, mind...
'Next year is going to be tough.' FOR GOODLUCK TOO?
Submitted by FiReClOuD OfGoD (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 22:31.
Olabayo said "Nigeria has not seen anything."
"Next year is going to be tough.
We may witness a revolution similar to what happened in Egypt.
The poor will face the rich.... There will be hunger and anger and this..,”
http://tribune.com.ng/sat/index.php/front-page-articles/6199-2012-predict..
He said: “It is a year that the untouchables will be consumed.. It is a year that the military will strike...
Olabayo said
“the year 2012 will be a year of divine flourishing for... But for the wicked, it is a year people will take their blood.”
I'M NOT A PROPHET. Its inevitable at this rate we are going!
"There will be anarchy and young officers will take over reign of power and put things right.”
If thats what it takes to KNOCK reason into their heads, do any of us have a say?
what can we do?
Submitted by pittgunz (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 19:43.
What can we really do asides talk n talk n more talk.only God will help us in this coutry Nigeria cos its heading for doom...
Are you surprised?
Submitted by El Farigo (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 18:15.
This is what you get when you put someone from a very poor background into a position of power and opulence. Because he so fears poverty so much, he would take enough to cater for generations unborn in his family. So ride on Jona!
Solutions.....
Submitted by Damocles (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 17:53.
@Tafawa Balewite, you are a positive brother, and that is good. But it may be that some of us have concluded that the only way NIGERIA LIVES, is for these traitors to die. Some of US just CANNOT see Nigeria progressing with the characters we have now, no matter how one spins it, The ELITES are the sworn BLOOD ENEMIES of Nigeria, and until they & their heartless families are wiped of the face of the earth, Nigeria will never know peace or progress. Now i am not a rich man so i cant wager a bet, but as the polpular saying goes, make we "siddon look" and see if Nigeria ever sees progress if justice is not brought down the necks of our enemies like the mythical SWORD of DAMOCLES. PS MERRY XMAS to all the suffering MASSES, We in the diaspora know ur plight, and we think of our people every day.
Jonanthan are u sleeping or slumber? Innocent nigerian are deing
Submitted by Anonymous Comrade Darlington (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 16:33.
jonanthan should rather focus on security of people in d country as innocent ones are deing of boko haram and nigeria should say no to his ambiqeous 1 billion naira for food.
why will he not remove subsisidy afterall he feeds on our tax and fuel all his chains of cars and that of his aids.
may God reward u all with evil.
How i wish boko haram will stop being coward by focusing thier attention on d leaders who hv looted our resources including sanusi-okonjo iweala and loads of other and stop bombing innocent and vulnerables nigerians, who are on the receiving end due to ineptitude of our leaders.
Governing is not about yourself, it is to serve and uplift!
Submitted by Biodun Oyewole (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 15:30.
If this man Jonathan doesn't read or hear what many people are saying about his priorities and make amends, then he must be dumb as people think and believe he is. Come on, you cannot govern like this or make obscene budget like this (for what anyway?) while unleashing untold hardship on the populace. Who is advising this man anyway? Do they have any blood in their veins at all? You can't continue like this and expect people to believe in you? This is getting utterly ridiculous! He needs to get himself together and govern, not rule. There's a big difference! Ngozi-Iweala is there pontificating about spending, about subsidy. What about all this unholy government house spending that needs to be curtailed? You people are so hypocritical and frankly inhumane. There's so much poverty in the land, and you have the audacity to spend on obscene and unnecessary things! All of you have no decency whatsoever! Cut government spending to barest minimum and help these helpless people!
Re: Greed, As A Christmas Gift
Submitted by Pure Nigerian (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 14:51.
What a better way to say it. One cannot say it better. It is clear Mr. Jonathan lack the ability to lead. In the USA, the American president feed himself and his family unless on a state function where the govt pick up the tab but in Nigeria from local govt to president, it is tax payer that pick up their feed expenses and yet Mr. Jonathan and PDP wanted to transform Nigeria. This is what Nigerian who foolishly cannot think beyond their nose think is what is best for Nigeria. Enjoy the ride. Now we want Abati to come out and explain to Nigerians.
"the giant of africa"
Submitted by Fe.muwe. on December 25, 2011 - 14:37.
grandiosity is a confession of impotence, and poor little jona is just a figurehead for the ravenous PDP monster. they should all choke to death on their own greed, as it was with bros abacha.
as for leaders who "cannot be corrupted with food", we shall always honour akanu ibiam, aminu kano and gani fawe.hinmi--real giants of whom 9ja people can be proud.
Again - No Solutions just criticisms as usual
Submitted by Tafawa Balewite - ATBU (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 14:07.
Again, your well written prose offers no solutions just the same old hallmark - Our Leaders are bad!
We know that already so, mere cataloging the woes will not solve the issue.
A possible solution in my opinion is this - other than the immediate family members of the President and Vice president, any other person partaking in consuming meals in Aso Rock should be made to pay for it.
The question then becomes - what about foreign dignitaries and those on official visits to the seat of power? Simple, Government should be made to pay for the meals on a "pay-as-you-eat" basis.
One more thing is - nothing on the menu should be imported. If we don't have the brains of wherewithal to produce some of the foreign food items we so much crave for, then, we don't have any business devouring them.
If the President cannot drink from water running from taps in Aso Rock, then, he should go without water till he leaves Aso Rock.
Don't blame him.....
Submitted by emmy (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 13:56.
Hmmm. "If he's going to eat the baby's lunch in full view of its parents, will he not eat the baby when its parents are away ?"
Don't blame him, it's because the parents are docile and given to suffering. The parents had the opportunity to kick him back to the creeks where he belongs but chose to become gullible (as always) believing he's their baby's messiah despite the fact that his antecedence kept crying to the contrary. while their house was burning, they were busy chasing rats.
Let them bear the brunt.
Eating habit..
Submitted by PM (not verified) on December 25, 2011 - 13:44.
"And if he is going to eat the baby’s lunch in full view of its parents, will he not eat the baby when its parents are away?".....Uhmmmm...food for thought!!!
