A Mansion To Match “The Personality” Of Our Homeless Vice President By Ogaga Ifowodo

Columnist: 
Ogaga Ifowodo

You wish to Allah the Merciful that what you heard about the request for an additional N9 billion for the construction of a brand new mansion for the Vice President is not true, that you had just woken up from a nightmare when you heard lying voices in the dark seeking to “heat up” your head and “the polity” (apologies to President Jonathan’s spokesmen). Alas, it is true. When N7.5 billion was originally approved, in 2009, for the construction of the same house, you had dismissed, with a holy oath, the father of lies who had been whispering such damnable falsehood in your ear.  You were as incredulous as Adeyemi Smart, a senator, would be three years later when Adamu Ismail, executive secretary of the Federal Capital Development Authority defended the act of naked plunder before the FCT senate committee, and you screamed at the fleeing Satan: “Is this house to be built on earth or in heaven? Will the sand, cement, iron rods, tiles, doors and every other material needed for it be made of gold? Will the builders and labourers be paid in gold weights? Tuffia! Get thee behind me, Satan,” you railed and went about your business.

Yet it was true then as it is now. Ismail did not once mention “gold” as he explained the scope of Project VP’s Mansion. The additional N9 billion, a 120 percent increase to the original approved sum, is needed to “build a banquet hall, protocol guest house, two other guest houses and civil infrastructure, as well as to purchase furniture and install security gadgets.” Apparently, there had been an unforgivable, even criminal, neglect in the original plan and design of the mansion. But it goes without saying that without these additional amenities, the resultant edifice would be unfit for purpose and an insult to the office and person of the vice president. Which is why Ismail was quick to inform the senate that the “additional scope to be done on the project” (sic) was “because of the personality of Mr Vice President.”

Got it? A mansion befitting of the Vice President’s personality. Got the bit about civil infrastructure too? According to Ismail, the Bureau of Public Procurement “approved over N6 billion” after vetting the request but that “would not be enough,” given that “there are some other adjustments needed to be done,” the details of which he would disclose at a later date and time. But why trouble him to justify what every fool knows? Take only one befitting amenity, the banquet hall, which is to gulp N2.2 billion. As General Obasanjo, who should know, told us, high public service is an invitation to “come and chop.” Where is the best place to chop? A banquet hall, of course! And what should the tables, chairs, chinaware, cutlery and the very walls of the hall itself be made of if the chopping is to be worth its salt (pun intended)? Why, gold! As for the food, let’s just say that it is not what every Mukoro, Musa or Moriamo, with no personality, eats in a Mama-Put or buka far from banquet halls.

There was one almost plausible justification for Project VP’s Mansion.  Since 1999 when the great new epoch of democracy dawned on us, the vice president has been, to our shame, homeless. Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar squatted in the official residence of the Chief Justice throughout his tenure. Jonathan endured the added indignity of being relocated to Akinola Aguda House, the Presidential guest house, before blind luck elevated him to Aso Rock. This unflattering image of a wandering, homeless vice president of the oil-crazed Giant of Africa is what the government seeks to erase quickly before we become the laughing-stock of the world. Thankfully, we have petro-dollars to burn. What was it former military dictator General Yakubu Gowon is reputed to have said at the beginning of our oil-induced madness — that money is not our problem but how to spend it? We have long solved that problem, with the cement armada that followed that utterance, appropriately enough, as a proof. So, let us build a N16 billion mansion to match the personality of our vice president. And let us remember to furnish it with furniture “bought from heaven,” as the bewildered Senator Adeyemi wondered aloud.

Only that after this, we must never again hear of government officials going to Germany, anywhere outside the borders of this rich country, for medical treatment. The president and all political office holders must be prohibited from sending their children to school abroad while they remain in office. A country that can lavish so many billions on its vice president’s house is clearly not a beggar nation. Therefore, Jonathan must not attempt the inhuman act of levying another expropriation tax on citizens reeling from the monstrous blows of endemic joblessness and poverty by way of a further withdrawal of the bogus, so-called subsidy on refined oil products.  For just think what N16 billion could do to transform one of our teaching hospitals, making it unnecessary for Mrs Jonathan to enrich Germany with the loads of hard currency she frittered away during her recent “vacation?” Or what that sum could do to rehabilitate primary schools across the country even if at a mere N500 million per state? Just think!

omoliho@gmail.com

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How can you say ss ned sE To

How can you say ss ned sE To survive.hahaha stop fooling ur self.sE ARE THE WORST SET OF PEOPLE U WILL EVA WANT TO MERGE WIT.hahaha u guyz are really funny.

VP House

The looters cut across every geo political zones in Nigeria. They will not allow Nigeria to disintegrate untill they finish milking the resources.A, he will child typical Child is egocentric. You take away a Child's toy and give it to another, he will definitely kick against it. That is exactly what is happening to the Nigeria nation presently.Obasanjo took the toy that 'belongs' to NE and NW and gave it to SS. What do you expect ? Violence .

VP House

The looters cut across every geo political zones in Nigeria. They will not allow Nigeria to disintegrate untill they finish milking the resources.A typical Child is egocentric. You take away a Child's toy and give it to another, he will definitely kick against it. That is exactly what is happening to the Nigeria nation presently.Obasanjo took the toy that 'belongs' to NE and NW and gave it to SS. What do you expect ? Violence .

2015!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NIGERIA WILL BREAK UP IN 2015. I HAVE PERSONALLY SEEN THE DOCUMENT OUTLINING THE PLAN FOR BREAKING UP THE COUNTRY. THE FINANCIERS ARE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS PROJECT FOR REASONS THAT I CANNOT DIVULGE AT THIS TIME.THE FIRST STAGE IS ALREADY IN MOTION AS WE SPEAK ONLY YOU JUST DON'T KNOW IT.

Peter think again

@peter. And don't get me started on the 'second fiddle' thing. All this regions, the SW, SE, and SS at one time or another, were equally guilty of playing the second fiddle to the North.
Mistakes were made during the civil war, and I'm sure the Igbos regret any wrong done to their neighbours.
The SS and SE are capable of living in one republic but if not, don't think the Igbos cannot survive on their own. Believe me when I say an alliance will be more advantageous for the SS than it would for the SE.

Akpos is right

@peters. And do you think the chameleon @Ade A who is shedding his crocodile tears for the SS really has you in his heart? Why would somebody who is neither from the SS or SE not want an alliance between the two regions? What does the person have to lose? Don't you see @peters that they want to play the typical divide and rule game?

Let Akpos be

@ peter, you are big fool. One of the reasons Ojukwu went to war was because Gowon reneged on a gentleman agreement that would have seen each region, including yours firmly in control of their resource.
You, like some other Niger Deltans are still gorging on the misinformation spread by the Hausa-Fulanis about the Igbos during the civil war.
You think Yorubas are your friend? Why haven't you ever gotten angry that most of these oil companies have their headquarters located in the south west? Or that most developmental projects financed with 'your' oil money are sited mainly in the north and south west? Do you realise that the SS and SE are the most under developed in Nigeria?

Impunity has become a culture

Impunity has become a culture in our clime.

@ Affey

Even when the oil dries up they will resort to borrowing mortgaging the future of unborn Nigerians. The politician class is the worst cancer destroying the very fabric of the society. What to do? Target and kill the political class, wipe them off otherwise just like cancer it will kill you.

Foolish Akpo

Akpo 1 or what u call yr name. Continue to deceive yourself wth your ELUSIVE SE+SS.I am from SS and we can never ever go with SE no matter how you try to romance us obviously because of the oil. Do not be stupid enough to think that SS has forgotten what Biafra did to our people (genocide) due to Ojukwu's mad ambition. Even if we decided not to go with the north we shall prefer SW to Dubious and Selfish SE. SW may not have oil they are still the most civilized region and I stand to be corrected. If I were you , I would work to integrate and strengthen the SE polity so that they will stop betraying themselves and stop worshiping Money. You are here condemning the North why SE Elites are always eager to play second fiddle to the Northerners. Fight your own course and stop romancing SS please.

What a waste!

What a waste!

IFOWODO D ANIOMA QUEEN SEE HOW FOOLISH U LUK

VICE-PRESIDENT Namadi Sambo, on Monday, dissociated himself from the controversy surrounding the proposed construction of a new residence for the vice-president, saying that it has nothing to do with him. He explained in a statement issued by his spokesman, Umar Sani, in Abuja that the authorities of the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) were merely implementing the provision of the Abuja Master Plan by pressing ahead with the project.Noting that his attention had been drawn to the “unnecessary controversies the building of the permanent residence of the vice-president is generating in the media,” the vice-president stressed that he had taken stock of the issues and decided to clarify them with a view to putting the to rest. According to him, “Aguda House, the current temporary residence of the vice president was designated in the Abuja Master plan as a presidential Guest House.,

@Ade A - Why cry more than the bereaved?

Who told you that Akpos1 one is not from the SS? Have you heard any SS deny him? In any case do you understand geography at all?

Pick up a map of "Continent Nigeria" - apologies to akpos1, and check whether SS&SE are not one country. Is Calabar not SE. Do you not know that some parts of PH speak Ibo. From some villages in aba you can trek to akwa Ibom. Great General Effiong is from where?

The seemingly unlikely union of SS&SE is naturally imminent. No matter hw you the Yoruba wish otherwise, methinks the SS&SE will sooner than later break away. We have all the potential to be the greatest country on d planent.

Chief Onome Onoriode ESQ

@Absam : See your life? Akpos1 is teachin accounting NOT Maths

Yeye Yoruba fool.

How come you cannot recognize simple basic accounting & statement of account. Check behind every Bank Calender or Company prospectus or Magazine, you will find Financial statements there. Olodo.

End of year Statement of Accounts – Continent Nigeria

ASSETS
(SS+SE) ─ (NE+NW+NC+SW)

CAPITAL
SS- Crude Oil,Liquefied Natural Gas, Music,Comedy,
Acting,Limestone,TinOre,Agriculture,
Sports(Soccer M&Female teams)
SE- Crude Oil & Coal, Music,Comedy,Acting,
Sports(Soccer M & Female teams)
Hospitality Industry, Innovations,Agriculture
-Fruits,Vegetables, Cassava etc

LIABILITY
NW--Alimajiri, Illiteracy, corruption,draught,
educationally & 'sportistically' disadvantaged
NE--Suicide bombers, Almajiri,morbid Lead deposits
Corruption,Edu &'sportistically' disadvantaged
NC--Vampire Fulani herdsmen,Corruption,Dollar in
cap senators,Edu & sportisticaly disadvantaged
SW--Cowards, fraud stars, traitors,slaves,
conspirators, corruption

NOTES/SUMMARY
Total Revenue: (SS+SE)
Total Loss : (NE+NW+NC+SW)

I need not comment further. How long will d SS&SE continue wit dis huge liability West&North? How long?

Long live the United States of the SS&SE

Where're the innocent nigerians?

Thanks for your sympathy... But I wish to ask: where are the innocents in nigéria?
Unless you're not a frequent comer to nig',... This people thieve billions because that's what are at their disposal. The grade descends until you get unarmed, un-escorted thieves who thieve 100 or less...

Akpos 1 and his illusion

@Akpos 1, I just wonder at your illusion everytime you post comments classifying SS+SE. It is a dream that can't come to reality. SS can never go with u guys in SE. You are only pretending with your name showing as if u are from SS, u are from SE. Whatever u like, post against the SW, it is an effort in futility. "He who God bless, no one can curse".
Without SW, note, SE is nowhere. Mark my word. Avoid statements that are divisive. U are among those who are ungrateful to the SW and that will lead to your doom.

There was a United State of SS&SE

@Akpos1 your Maths does not add up. You failed to add SE= Kidnapping, 419 etc, and SS = lazy, focus-less, Jona the presido to your equation. Go back to school if there are any with widows and desks in Balyesa.

Reply

Ogogo,continue to write about this exercise in futility until the rogues -that-be bring it to a grinding halt!

End of year Statement of Accounts – Continent Nigeria

ASSETS
(SS+SE) ─ (NE+NW+NC+SW)

CAPITAL
SS- Crude Oil,Liquefied Natural Gas,Music,
Comedy,Acting,Limestone,Tin Ore,Agriculture
Sports(Soccer Male & Female teams)
SE- Crude Oil & Coal, Music, Comedy,Acting,
Sports(Soccer M & Female teams)
Hospitality Industry, Innovations,Agriculture
e.g., Fruits,Vegetables, Cassava etc

LIABILITY
NW-- Alimajiri, Illiteracy, corruption, draught,
educationally disadvantaged
NE-- Suicide bombers, Almajiri, Corruption,
morbid Lead deposits
NC-- Vampire Fulani herdsmen,Corruption,
Dollar in cap senators
SW-- Cowards, fraud stars, traitors, slaves,
conspirators, corruption

Notes/Summary
Total Revenue: (SS+SE)
Total Loss : (NE+NW+NC+SW)

I need not comment further. How long will the SS&SE continue with this huge liability West & North? How long?

Long live the United States of the SS&SE

End of year Statement of Accounts – Continent Nigeria

ASSETS
(SS+SE) ─ (NE+NW+NC+SW)

CAPITAL
SS-- Crude Oil,Liquefied Natural Gas,Music,
Comedy,Acting,Limestone,Tin Ore,
Sports(Soccer Male & Female teams)
SE-- Crude Oil & Coal, Music, Comedy,Acting,
Sports(Soccer M & Female teams)
Hospitality Industry, Agriculture e.g.,
Fruits,Vegetables, Cassava etc

LIABILITY
NW-- Alimajiri, Illiteracy, corruption, draught,
educationally disadvantaged
NE-- Suicide bombers, Almajiri, Corruption,
morbid Lead deposits
NC-- Vampire Fulani herdsmen,Corruption,
Dollar in cap senators
SW-- Cowards, fraud stars, traitors, slaves,
conspirators, corruption

Notes/Summary
Total Revenue: (SS+SE)
Total Loss : (NE+NW+NC+SW)

I need not comment further. How long will the SS&SE continue with this huge liability West & North? How long?

Long live the United States of the SS&SE

Something is amiss in Nigeria Leaders' mental health

There is no other way to say this other than to say that something is wrong with the mental health condition of Nigeria leaders. If not, why this waste of resources in a country where the people live on less than $2 a day? A country where there are no jobs for her citizens, where the health and education sectors are in tatters? A place where there are no roads & general infrastructural decay? Jonathan's government is a complete failure. I am just short of words to express how sad I am with this government. God will definitely judge this government and every other people involved in bringing this untold hardship to their fellow countrymen and women.

only god can judge

when innocent nigerians are dying of terror, hunger and starvation when the CBN governor himself suggested massive retrenchment of civil servant despite thousands of unemployed youth all because he presume the government cannot afford their salary but yet, the FCT can still afford multi billion dollar mansion for vice president. Hmm!!! am speechless.

Fool na fool no matter the age....as Fela said.

My brother Ogaga, It is very unfortunate that our public officials just have brains but do not think. I think that ordinary Nigerians are more stupid though because these same non functional nincompoops finish their tenures and when they walk on the streets, you see people hailing them like they are demi gods. where the right reaction to these people should be to throw tomatoes and banana peels at them. I was thinking just like you , as in do you know what 16 billion can do to Nigeria's primary education system if truly spent on education needs? or what 16 billion can do to at least 4 hospitals elevating them to state of the art hospitals even if they want to employ white doctors to run it but in Nigeria; located in 4 of the 6 geopolitical zones? My brother, we have Politicians that aren't visionaries and that is one of Nigeria's problems. As for me, I would like to abort ship and change nationality cos being a Nigerian is a waste of Nationality. lol. Fools truly na fools sha.

It is a lost case

Sadly, nothing will change until that crude oil dries up

re: vice president's crib

times i wish this nightmare would come to an end. Stories and facts with proof we hear daily make one cringe. To think it is happening across all tiers and sectors of governance in this nation.

A Naked Dancer

I comment no more because we are a nation of naked dancers pretending to be clothed when even the blinds notice their naked foolery. The Legislative Arms that approves such budget and the citizens that remain silent in the face of wholesale looting of their common wealth and that of the future generation to come are all naked dancers.We need miracle deliverance for us to realize our naked state.

And The Stealing Continue Big Time

The share brazenness of the heists going on under Olodo Jonathan is becoming dangerously mindnumbing.

Adamu Ismail, executive secretary of the Federal Capital Development Authority obviously did not see the heist for what it is. He saw it as an opportunity brought to them by "Allah" for them to loot. I bet my last last kobo that when he got his own share of the loot he made an immediate trip to Mecca, Saudi Arabia to give glory to "Allah" and give Him His cut (Ismail doesnt eat alone. you know)

How did someone as stupid as Adamu Ismail become the executive secretary of such a sensitive organisation in Nigeria? Yeah, because he is very stupid.

Jonathan is making Obasanjo look like Eeinsten reincarnate.

And the bucks stops on your lap Jonathan, the idiot from Otuoke.

Anioma Queen the money is coming from d SS

Sadly the money U referred in yr boko haramic article, is coming from the oil revenue base of the SS-that is the issue at stake. And not from the sweat, tears and sorrows of the blood stained conscience of BH.

When bad policy talks

When monetization came in to being,this was going to be the inevitable consequence.We must get rid of that policy quickly and make sure that no matter at what cost we end up paying for the Vice President's accommodation,it remains the home of all future Vice Presidents of Nigeria.That this is not given out to Namadi Sambo.
We must force the hand of government now,on this monetization rubbish.

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