A: Hello paddy paddy
B: Hi! And what’s the matter with you? You seem to be happy.
A: First of all shout a big “halleluiah” to God Almighty
B: H A L L E L U Y A H! So what’s the news?
A: The Lord has been doing great things in our church. You know ever since Pastor Oyedepo of Winners Chapel bought an Airplane, we of the Redeemed Christian Church God have been on our kneels crying unto God to bless us with something unique and God answered that prayer. By the anointing of the Spirit of God in me, I hereby announce to you that “Daddy” has just bought a 15 seater private Jet at the rate of $28 million dollars to the Glory of God.
B: W H A T?
A: And Daddy has announced that everyone should be ready for a special thanksgiving service to celebrate what God has done for us.
B: Wait a minute. Did I hear you say “28 million naira”?
A: NO! I said $28 million USD.
B: And you say that calls for celebrations?
A: Yes of course or what do you think?
B: Hmm Nothing. I was just wondering what kind of Leader your General Overseer would be if he was to be the President of this Nation.
A; And what are you trying to say?
B: I am not “TRYING TO” but actually I’m saying you devotees of the RCCG have just joined the league of societies with leaders with misplaced priorities.
A: That’s an insult and I won’t seat here watch you say unprintable words about a widely respected Man Of God. I’ll advise you watch your mouth before Holy Ghost fire consumes you.
B: Habba! Has it come to that? OK can I finish what I’m saying?
A: Yes you can but mind your language.
B: How long have you been attending that church?
A: Since I got born again 7 years ago.
B: And when did you graduate from the Polytechnic?
A: 4 years ago. Of what relevance are these questions?
B: When did you get a job?
A: I got my job 6 months ago and even though it’s not a well paid job but I’m believing God for a better one soon. The bible says “do not despise your humble beginning”. God is just testing me with this job I’m doing at present and I know when I’m faithful with it, He (GOD) will provide a greater and better one.
B: One thing I like about you guys is that you always have quotes from the bible to back up your unreasonable arguments. If I may ask, do you even know that 28 million dollars is about 4billion naira?
A: N I G E R I A N S! ah ah! How can 28 million USD be about 4 billion N A I R A? I disagree with you. It should be around! Ehm around!! Ok lets calculate it together. What’s the current exchange rate?
B: Don’t even talk of the current exchange rate. Simply put. At 143 Naira to 1 US Dollar, you can now imagine what I am talking about.
A: At that rate 28 million USD will be about 4.4 Billion Naira!! Oh my God? That’s damn too expensive to purchase a Jet that can only carry 15 people at a time. NO! NO! NO! This is a blunder. A big one for that matter. Of what economic value is the acquisition of this Jet to the Church?
B: That is the BIG question you and other RCCG devotees MUST ask your G.O at the General Congress.
A: We don’t have opportunity to voice out our opinions. Only the regional leaders at State levels hold meetings with the G.O. we only go to church and get information from our Pastors But to be sincere I’m still thinking of what 4 billion naira would do in the lives of legion of unemployed youths of the Redeemed Christian Church of God if the money had been used to create small scale businesses or factories especially now that the financial crisis is taking it’s toll on every country on Earth not even the almighty U.S.A is exempted.
B: Now you are talking. Most of our so called pastors have impoverished their followers all in the name of Jesus whom some of them don’t truly believe will ever come back again. Some of the unchecked activities of these M.O.Gs have weakened our economy almost beyond redemption. They keep preaching prosperity! Telling people to cast their bread upon the waters, adopting “GIVE AND IT SHALL BE GIVING UNTO YOU” as a congregational anthem while “MY GOD IS A GREAT PROVIDER” remains their regular slogan. Remember I was into phone call business before I got my job. You can’t believe I started that business with about 10,000 naira and it really sustained me through my unemployed years. My cousin is managing it now because as a member of Redeem who graduated 2 years ago, she has no Job and she MUST pay Tights, give Offerings (even in mid-week services and Choir meetings), participate in Special Fund Raising Services, Sow the Seed of Faith, and many more.
A: This is too big for a young unemployed lady to bear.
B: Yeah! Most especially Ones who listen to sermons of “NO SUGAR DADDY! NO BOYFRIEND! NO S*X” delivered by their pastors on weekly basis. And you know nothing goes for nothing in this society of ours. Every Company Manager wants to get through the “Beautiful Gate” before considering employment offer and will continue to demand for “More” which refusal may put the Job on the line. Young unemployed ladies can avoid all these sexual advances from sex maniacs who parade themselves as Managers, if only the Church leaders would use the resources milked out of these same people in the right manner.
A: So many evil is going on in this Country every second of the day but I’m happy the Minister for Information and National Orientation is starting a Re-branding campaign for the Nation and this will surely attract many investors as our investment policy allows Investors of 100 percent reparation. International donors will also be willing to help us if the image and perception of international community about us is improved.
B: Do you know your Church has sent the wrong message to the international donors who are willing to help us financially?
A: How? After all the G.O is not a government official and has no business with governance of this nation.
B: My friend can’t you think? Don’t you know buying a Jet for $28 Million dollars by just one church is as good as confirming to the whole world the declaration of one of the past military rulers of this country.
A: Who was that and what did he say?
B:Yakubu Gowon declared that the problem of this nation is not money but how to spend it.
A: But I think if they want to help they will without thinking about the Jet bought by the G.O.
B: And I think it’s only a fool that will keep giving money to someone whose attitudes and public declarations show that he has more than enough.
A: You wait and see after this re-branding project, Nigeria will bounce back again.
B: What are re-branding?
A: Our image of course.
B: We are re-branding Corruption, Greed, Misplace priorities, Fraud, Insecurity, Self centeredness, Legislooting, Massive looting,. and other made in Nigeria products.
A: Why are you so much against the effort of this energetic woman who performed wonders as NAFDAC Director General?
B: Please don’t get me wrong. I just feel we should start with Internal rebranding before going for the external.
A: How do you mean?
B: All Government officials, Opinion leaders, ethnic majority and minority leaders, religious leaders, the rich and the poor, parents and guardians, students and teachers, youths and elders, business people, and every stake holder in the entity called Nigeria should be rebranded. We should have a reorientation about every single thing that affects our collective destiny as a nation. After this is done then we need not spend billions of naira to inform the rest of the world we are a people of integrity.
A: Boy watch what you say before you start receiving death threats like someone received from Intercontinental Bank for writing article that does not go well with the Leadership of the Bank.
B: Are you saying RCCG members can threaten me for exercising my right to freedom of opinion?
A: Not that but anything can happen in this country. Or have you forgotten about Reverend King?
B: yeah you are right. S O M E B O D Y P R A I S E T H E L O R D
A: H A L L E L U Y A H!
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