Nigerians I bring to you greetings from a land not known to mortals, the land where everything comes down to, the GRAND court of all mortals. My name is Saint Truth, the Official spokesman in our land. The purpose of this very unusual press statement is to inform you Nigerians that all is not well in our land, because of this I will speak with anger.
On several occasions i have had the cause to intercept the prayer requests, prayer conduct, prayer informed, prayer this prayer that, also your cries and worries, wishes and constant use of profane language sent to the land, where i am coming from.
Your Priest, your Reverends your Pastors, Imams, Prophets, Elders, politicians, Market Women, Farmers, Students, Workers, Doctors, Lawyers, Artisans, Housewives, Disabled, Kidnappers, Armed Robbers, Treasury Looters, and the dying amongst you are causing a big problem here. Every second of the day we received over a billion of request from your Nation of 150million people who have used the link freely given to all men to almost give us Insomnia (if not that we are above mortals). Infact you ought to know that amongst all the nations in the Planet Earth, your country Nigeria records most prayer request than another country.
Following the emergency meeting held in my place of coming last month, it was agreed that something needed to be done about Nigeria, since it is very certain that we will soon be using hearing aids as a result of Nigerians constant voicing in my place. Of all the issues tabled out, one solution was adopted. As the mouth piece of my place whose duty is to inform the earth of our deliberations and happenings, I hereby present the decision we took about Nigeria.
1. There will a temporally closure of the link between Nigeria and our place, starting from 2nd December, The exisitng link is now broken, locked, and removed. Nigerians will no longer annoy my master who is now vexing.
2. There will be an open day in my place of coming for decisions to be made on all the petitions pending from Nigeria. However no one is invited, as this will be done above your line of reach.
3. Wiping out the problem of Nigeria will commence immediately to prevent a recurrence.
4. Those who have held Nigerians at almost gun point will be visited by the 18mm 32caliber semi automatic hand gun before the end of 2009
5. The Angel of Change has been sent to Nigeria for the job description you will see from now. (Refer to No 4)
6. The cabal that is presently holding the future of millions of Nigerians will receive an upgraded version of Pharaoh that Egyptian guy's treatment.
7. The wrath experience in Egypt will be a child's play compare to the anger of our master has since last month sent to Nigeria.
8. No repentant will be welcomed, as the link is broken
9. I have been asked to explain this quote war is peace, freedom is slavery, ignorance is strength.......(See end of this statement)
10. I am not in habit of talking much, I am not Saddam's Information Minister..........hmmm what is that his name sef?
11. Words of the Master is clear and not vague
"War Is Peace” because having a common enemy keeps the people of (Nigeria) united by greed. “Freedom Is Slavery” because, according to the Party, the man who is independent is doomed to fail. By the same token, “Slavery Is Freedom,” because the man subjected to the collective will is free from danger and want. “Ignorance Is Strength” because the inability of the people to recognize these contradictions cements the power of the authoritarian regime.
The Land Nigeria is about to be healed......Praise thy Lord
This is your petition over the years.
Welcome the Angel of Change with all my hearts and minds...................
No questions will be entertained.
Thank You.
Signed on behalf of the council
St Truth
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