May 9, 2010
Now that we are departing from the days of momentum failure of leadership, subversion of 1999 constitution, total disregard for human feelings, titillating looting of communal treasury, colossal impunity, quantum greed and selfishness, ruse of law, breeding of cabal, disrespect for justice system, and bastardization of the polity and so on and so forth, that made the Yar’Adua stolen Presidency thick.
For those of you who want to eulogize him differently na una sabi. It will be worthy to welcome Her Excellency Dame Patience Jonathan the new First Lady of Nigeria.
What befell UMYA, Turai and her immediate cabal is a case where mere mortals play god, forgetting they will one day answer the last call to the land of great beyond. Now that the head of the cabal is cut off by the almighty hand that does not condone impunity, lies, cheating, thieving etc, it will be very nice to see the flip of the drama. Turai should know that after next week, there will a total vacuum in her Kastina home. All those political harlots coming to pay unnecessary and undeserving tributes will soon disappear, some may start calling for her head to be cut off. After the weeks of mourning things will go back to normal, all man to his mat oh Nigerians. Then the former goddess will be all alone in far away Kastina when she will midwife the true meaning of power belongs to the gods not men. The loss of power will be dawn on her (korokoro).
Like typical 9ja style, UMYA’s death opened a new political expressway for some already dead politicians who are now using this opportunity to rejuvenate and catapult themselves into relevance by being the first to travel to Kastina in solidarity with the former “god”. I am very happy his death has since closed doors for some evil actors who held sway whilst the macabre lasted. Do I have to remind Tuari that she has become totally irrelevant from now on? The fake marriages she forced her daughters into will soon start to crumble just before her very eyes. Political power has changed hands my guy. All roads now lead to Dame Patience. Will she become another “god”? Time will tell.
Madam Tuari should use this opportunity to take as much pictures as possible, because this will be the last time she will see these charlatan who are better known as political prostitutes with no shame. I will advise her to buy a special diary and photo album for this purpose, she will need them to record events and to store the images of those that she once knew. Madam Turai should ask her partner in looting and greed Maryam Abacha how some close friends and associates of her dark goggled husband ran away with this loot soon after the gods gave him a cursed apple to eat in the presence of some Lebanese imported naked beauties.
When the going was good, Tuari had many friends who almost (if not) licked her feet, we were even told by one migida a member of our upper house of senate that our own Aunty Dora cooked some Jollof rice and “Ofe Anambra” those days when there was competition to please Madam. Tuari’s Kitchen was like Jamb office where many lined up to fetch water, wash plates and deliver kerosine. It remains a good WAEC question to ask if our former Aso Rock god (Turai) can really and truthfully cope with life after Aso Rock. Your guess is as good as mine.
Turai who seats on kegs of gun keg of powder, has her husband families to contend with for kidnapping their son and later (only her and her cabal) can successfully answer when and who killed UMYA. We can only assume she did, else why did she monopolize him to the point his family members were not allowed to sight him ... Haba Tuari, Haba!
As we wave Tuari goodbye with one hand, we welcome Dame Patience with another. Very little is known of the present Madam of the house, but trust me all that we know is not very pleasant to our ears. The only thing we know is that she has/had a file with EFCC; I heard it has to do with $13.5m and some next #100m. Well, it will make much sense to know what stage her EFCC file is, or has it developed wings? Oh no! My EFCC contact told me in confidence it was amongst those that went up in flames when Madam Waziri instigated a fire last 2 weeks in EFCC Lagos office. How can we forget she was caught in Lagos Airport not Abuja. So we don’t have a file abi? Thank the gods our memories were not caught in that “evidence killing fire” we still remember what we heard and read. Dame Jonathan may your reign in Aso Rock be loot and scandals free (Amen).
Dame Patience, my advice is that you should take a journey to the Yar’Adua quarters in Kastina State, where a certain woman who happens to be your predecessor has been sent to by an act of nature, although she unwillingly went, but that is not the case now. This time, please don’t go there crying like you did on NTA she is aware of the drama/show you put up, repeating that in Kastina will be totally unnecessarily. Humbly go to her for some tutorials on how to behave as first lady. Your first class will be “FIRST LADY 101” (Introduction to Nigeria First Ladyship) Trust me she has lots of experiences to offer, you don’t need to pay her, your tears on NTA has paid the price for you.
I will like you to spend at least 2days with her to learn “102” of the module (The Power of Madam President) you will be amassed to know certain things about Nigeria and her political elites, in that module she will teach you how to be the power behind the Presido. We have seen these before with Ndidi Babangida, Maryam Abacha, Stella Obansanjo and now Tuari Yar’Adua. Those men that you once begged to help your husband in one way or the other, will now queue to wash your toilet. Don’t even bother coughing because plenty of them will be glad to swallow the reject.
The very same men and women who stood against your husband when Tuari held power, will start calling you... Mummy, Mother Excellency, Awesome Mother, Mama Jonathan, and some will even find some names you won’t believe existed in this world. Trust Nigerians they can do anything to get attention, even if they have to deny their wives and husbands. Dame Patience, they will invite you to events that make sense or not, like to child naming, street sweeping and many more.
The Women association will award you “The Mother of the Year 2010”; the Nigeria Students Association will present you with the “Most Outstanding Mother”. Newspapers Houses will join the queue. Church women will not be left in the dark, so many awards and recognitions will follow, and our Universities (private and public) will crown you Doctor of anything they can make out. Our Governors and Local government Chairmen wives will form associations of “first and second ladies” you will be the Chairperson, Patron, CEO, etc. Wallahi! Watch out for those that even said “No Southern will be President” their wives will be the first to visit you. In all these, you may want to ask yourself how you achieved the awards or how come you are so loved by all these people. Dame Patience its all politics madam. Once your time is up, they will disappear like gas.
Madam Jonathan, none of these people will remind you of the need to clear your name in EFCC, because they are not just like every other person, these guys will do anything to remain relevant. Ask Tuari to teach you the “103” of your tutorials (The Power of Praise Singers) Am sure by the time you have finished your first day in her chamber you would have learnt a lot about our country than you previously know. This will equip you for the real work ahead.
Why did I call it “real work”? Ok let me try to explain what I mean. In Nigeria it is a great deal of work taming the sycophants that will soon turn Aso Rock their next home, satisfying all of them will not be an easy ride ma’am. They will send their wives, mothers and children’s to come cook different kinds of food for you, the Yoruba women among them will prepare the kind of ewe-du soup that will leave you smiling, trust the Igbo women for nice ofe Owerri, should I remind you of our Calabar sisters? Ohhhh! In all you do remember to make the best of your stay in Aso Rock (heaven on earth in Nigeria). A Place nobody will willingly want to relocate from.
But Above all remember log onto www.SaharaReporters.com where you will get unbiased reports of your activities.
Dame Patience Jonathan you are welcome to the Presidential Wing of Aso Rock.
[email protected]
For those of you who want to eulogize him differently na una sabi. It will be worthy to welcome Her Excellency Dame Patience Jonathan the new First Lady of Nigeria.
What befell UMYA, Turai and her immediate cabal is a case where mere mortals play god, forgetting they will one day answer the last call to the land of great beyond. Now that the head of the cabal is cut off by the almighty hand that does not condone impunity, lies, cheating, thieving etc, it will be very nice to see the flip of the drama. Turai should know that after next week, there will a total vacuum in her Kastina home. All those political harlots coming to pay unnecessary and undeserving tributes will soon disappear, some may start calling for her head to be cut off. After the weeks of mourning things will go back to normal, all man to his mat oh Nigerians. Then the former goddess will be all alone in far away Kastina when she will midwife the true meaning of power belongs to the gods not men. The loss of power will be dawn on her (korokoro).
Like typical 9ja style, UMYA’s death opened a new political expressway for some already dead politicians who are now using this opportunity to rejuvenate and catapult themselves into relevance by being the first to travel to Kastina in solidarity with the former “god”. I am very happy his death has since closed doors for some evil actors who held sway whilst the macabre lasted. Do I have to remind Tuari that she has become totally irrelevant from now on? The fake marriages she forced her daughters into will soon start to crumble just before her very eyes. Political power has changed hands my guy. All roads now lead to Dame Patience. Will she become another “god”? Time will tell.
Madam Tuari should use this opportunity to take as much pictures as possible, because this will be the last time she will see these charlatan who are better known as political prostitutes with no shame. I will advise her to buy a special diary and photo album for this purpose, she will need them to record events and to store the images of those that she once knew. Madam Turai should ask her partner in looting and greed Maryam Abacha how some close friends and associates of her dark goggled husband ran away with this loot soon after the gods gave him a cursed apple to eat in the presence of some Lebanese imported naked beauties.
When the going was good, Tuari had many friends who almost (if not) licked her feet, we were even told by one migida a member of our upper house of senate that our own Aunty Dora cooked some Jollof rice and “Ofe Anambra” those days when there was competition to please Madam. Tuari’s Kitchen was like Jamb office where many lined up to fetch water, wash plates and deliver kerosine. It remains a good WAEC question to ask if our former Aso Rock god (Turai) can really and truthfully cope with life after Aso Rock. Your guess is as good as mine.
Turai who seats on kegs of gun keg of powder, has her husband families to contend with for kidnapping their son and later (only her and her cabal) can successfully answer when and who killed UMYA. We can only assume she did, else why did she monopolize him to the point his family members were not allowed to sight him ... Haba Tuari, Haba!
As we wave Tuari goodbye with one hand, we welcome Dame Patience with another. Very little is known of the present Madam of the house, but trust me all that we know is not very pleasant to our ears. The only thing we know is that she has/had a file with EFCC; I heard it has to do with $13.5m and some next #100m. Well, it will make much sense to know what stage her EFCC file is, or has it developed wings? Oh no! My EFCC contact told me in confidence it was amongst those that went up in flames when Madam Waziri instigated a fire last 2 weeks in EFCC Lagos office. How can we forget she was caught in Lagos Airport not Abuja. So we don’t have a file abi? Thank the gods our memories were not caught in that “evidence killing fire” we still remember what we heard and read. Dame Jonathan may your reign in Aso Rock be loot and scandals free (Amen).
Dame Patience, my advice is that you should take a journey to the Yar’Adua quarters in Kastina State, where a certain woman who happens to be your predecessor has been sent to by an act of nature, although she unwillingly went, but that is not the case now. This time, please don’t go there crying like you did on NTA she is aware of the drama/show you put up, repeating that in Kastina will be totally unnecessarily. Humbly go to her for some tutorials on how to behave as first lady. Your first class will be “FIRST LADY 101” (Introduction to Nigeria First Ladyship) Trust me she has lots of experiences to offer, you don’t need to pay her, your tears on NTA has paid the price for you.
I will like you to spend at least 2days with her to learn “102” of the module (The Power of Madam President) you will be amassed to know certain things about Nigeria and her political elites, in that module she will teach you how to be the power behind the Presido. We have seen these before with Ndidi Babangida, Maryam Abacha, Stella Obansanjo and now Tuari Yar’Adua. Those men that you once begged to help your husband in one way or the other, will now queue to wash your toilet. Don’t even bother coughing because plenty of them will be glad to swallow the reject.
The very same men and women who stood against your husband when Tuari held power, will start calling you... Mummy, Mother Excellency, Awesome Mother, Mama Jonathan, and some will even find some names you won’t believe existed in this world. Trust Nigerians they can do anything to get attention, even if they have to deny their wives and husbands. Dame Patience, they will invite you to events that make sense or not, like to child naming, street sweeping and many more.
The Women association will award you “The Mother of the Year 2010”; the Nigeria Students Association will present you with the “Most Outstanding Mother”. Newspapers Houses will join the queue. Church women will not be left in the dark, so many awards and recognitions will follow, and our Universities (private and public) will crown you Doctor of anything they can make out. Our Governors and Local government Chairmen wives will form associations of “first and second ladies” you will be the Chairperson, Patron, CEO, etc. Wallahi! Watch out for those that even said “No Southern will be President” their wives will be the first to visit you. In all these, you may want to ask yourself how you achieved the awards or how come you are so loved by all these people. Dame Patience its all politics madam. Once your time is up, they will disappear like gas.
Madam Jonathan, none of these people will remind you of the need to clear your name in EFCC, because they are not just like every other person, these guys will do anything to remain relevant. Ask Tuari to teach you the “103” of your tutorials (The Power of Praise Singers) Am sure by the time you have finished your first day in her chamber you would have learnt a lot about our country than you previously know. This will equip you for the real work ahead.
Why did I call it “real work”? Ok let me try to explain what I mean. In Nigeria it is a great deal of work taming the sycophants that will soon turn Aso Rock their next home, satisfying all of them will not be an easy ride ma’am. They will send their wives, mothers and children’s to come cook different kinds of food for you, the Yoruba women among them will prepare the kind of ewe-du soup that will leave you smiling, trust the Igbo women for nice ofe Owerri, should I remind you of our Calabar sisters? Ohhhh! In all you do remember to make the best of your stay in Aso Rock (heaven on earth in Nigeria). A Place nobody will willingly want to relocate from.
But Above all remember log onto www.SaharaReporters.com where you will get unbiased reports of your activities.
Dame Patience Jonathan you are welcome to the Presidential Wing of Aso Rock.
[email protected]
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